If you ask me if everything is going well…
I’ll tell you, yes.
And that’s the truth.
Every doctor’s appointment has been positive. Ever since the first trimester ended, I’ve been feeling good. Being in quarantine has allowed me to rest more and eat better.
Of course, there has been the added stress of Covid, the news always bringing something crazy, and buying a first home 🤪, but overall, those things haven’t bothered me because I’m so happy to have a healthy baby.
What is the most stressful part of this pregnancy? The doctors appointments.
Early on in the pregnancy, I would have panic attacks about going to doctors appointments. Even though I thought the stress would subside once I got that first report, I was still left with anxiety for days after. I would feel relief after going to the doctor, but then would soon find a reason to stress again.
My God is faithful.
It’s hard to share about my doubts and my fears because I don’t want to lessen that statement. He was so present during my last pregnancy and He still is today. Even though I don’t always do my best to rely on Him, He gives me strength.
For example, I have to have more tests than a normal pregnancy. Coming up, is one of the those tests. On Monday, I got the phone call to schedule an appointment and I ignored the call, full knowing who it was.
I ignored the call because I just didn’t want to deal with it… especially not first thing Monday morning.
Moments after the call, the song “Raise a Hallelujah” came on. This is a tricky song for me (with courage and timing, I’ll explain more about that later). Despite the fact that I don’t want it to be, 😂 the song is a reminder to me of God’s presence in my situation.
I’m still in a place of wanting to ignore the stuff that’s hard, but God was letting me know that He’s in the middle of it with me. 🖤